I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Actions speak louder than pants.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize