Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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