So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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