Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
He has the fingertips of a God
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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