you guys were way drunker than both of me
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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