So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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