On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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