We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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