wat bout pragnant strippers??
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize