Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize