Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
The best revenge is premature balding
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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