Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
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I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
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she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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