I just made out with a guy for $7.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
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he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
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There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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