this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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