I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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