I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
This baby is an asshole
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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