random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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