I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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