wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I want her autograph on my taint
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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