gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize