the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
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