3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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