This is not my ceiling
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
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