foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize