You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
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I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
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If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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