I look better un-naked...
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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