We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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