Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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