In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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