While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize