i'm lost and i look like a hooker
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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