I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
we're making bets on your personal life
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize