Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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