I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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