your room smells of hookers.
And success
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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