I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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