You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize