Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

youre so sexy i want your bod

(410): View more from Maryland

dude, did you turn gay?

(949): View more from California

heather?

(410): View more from Maryland

this is jacob

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(949): youre so sexy i want your bod (410): dude, did you turn gay? (949): heather? (410): this is jacob http://tfl.nu/gn2b

Replies (14) Good night (953) Bad night (1943)
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(580): View more from Oklahoma

I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.

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(580): I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite. http://tfl.nu/hgau

Replies (12) Good night (679) Bad night (2496)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?

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(901): How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games? http://tfl.nu/94zu

Replies (14) Good night (4186) Bad night (693) Order T-Shirt
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(720): View more from Colorado

I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.

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(720): I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like. http://tfl.nu/6yf0

Replies (5) Good night (1507) Bad night (1021) Order T-Shirt
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.

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(612): Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us. http://tfl.nu/wdqz

Replies (5) Good night (4264) Bad night (970)
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(240): View more from Maryland

She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.

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(240): She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text. http://tfl.nu/g6ne

Replies (4) Good night (549) Bad night (2106) Order T-Shirt
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(801): View more from Utah

He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.

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(801): He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up. http://tfl.nu/2vsu

Replies (4) Good night (2824) Bad night (868) Order T-Shirt
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(778): View more from British Columbia

nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table

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(778): nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table http://tfl.nu/3lt3

Replies (8) Good night (1582) Bad night (1139)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.

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(618): Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/svji

Replies (14) Good night (1932) Bad night (737) Order T-Shirt
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(317): View more from Indiana

why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?

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(317): why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator? http://tfl.nu/5m0o

Replies (10) Good night (2643) Bad night (712) Order T-Shirt
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(480): View more from Arizona

I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before

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(480): I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before http://tfl.nu/7hf6

Replies (12) Good night (742) Bad night (1474) Order T-Shirt
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(619): View more from California

Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...

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(619): Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by... http://tfl.nu/g8gw

Replies (9) Good night (3555) Bad night (574)
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(204): View more from Manitoba

So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"

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(204): So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you" http://tfl.nu/y1sq

Replies (6) Good night (596) Bad night (2552) Order T-Shirt
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(936): View more from Texas

Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.

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(936): Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA. http://tfl.nu/7tz2

Replies (4) Good night (446) Bad night (190)
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(425): View more from Washington

But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture

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(425): But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture http://tfl.nu/bm5g

Replies (1) Good night (246) Bad night (73) Order T-Shirt

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