the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize