the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
no more duck duck goose at the bar
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
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