so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
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I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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