their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize