now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
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