am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Did I show you my penis last night?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize