So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
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My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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