okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
wow bdsm is so cute
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