real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize