her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
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she pinky promised me she was 18
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
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We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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