my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize