The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize